Avoid These Newborn Mistakes I Made as a First-Time Mom

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Becoming a first-time mom is an incredible journey filled with joy, challenges, and a lot of learning. In this blog post, I want to share some newborn mistakes I made as a first-time mom.

Society puts so much pressure on us to be good moms but doesn’t normalize the fact that mistakes are bound to happen due to the struggles that come with caring for a newborn.

It's essential to embrace the imperfections of motherhood and find growth in the process.

Here are some of the mistakes I made, along with insights that may help other new moms navigate the early stages of motherhood.

Ready?

common newborn mistakes to avoid

7 Mistakes I Made as a New Mom

1. Letting my baby fall asleep while breastfeeding

The early days of motherhood are filled with a desire to soak in every moment with your newborn.

Those snuggles are amazing, but I had developed a habit that made it challenging for my baby to self-soothe.

To this day, my baby still struggles to fall asleep without me breastfeeding him. It has been hard for other people to help him sleep when he wakes up.

Though being the only one who can put him to sleep used to overwhelm me, I’ve made peace with it.

If you’re OK with nursing your baby to sleep, then do it!

Contrary to what we’re told, nursing doesn’t mean your baby is going to have bad sleeping habits. It can actually be beneficial.

Still, if you need others to help you, you can try the following to break your baby from their dependence:

  • Gradually introduce your baby to the crib: start laying them down while they’re awake as part of their nap time routine. Once they get the hang of this, you can start introducing this at bedtime.
  • Establish a consistent nap and bedtime routine: reading a book before laying your baby down can create a soothing environment for your baby to drift off to sleep.
  • Around 6 months, and if you’re comfortable, you can try sleep training: I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready to do this but if you find your baby’s sleep difficulties to be hard on your mental health, you can try it.

Ultimately, teaching your baby to self-soothe fosters better sleep habits for both you and your baby. However, as long as you’re not stressed by it, nursing your baby to sleep can accomplish this as well.

As moms, we all make mistakes. However, we sometimes feel a lot of guilt for these mistakes. Make sure to grab my FREE Letting Go of Mom Guilt journal so you can ditch the guilt and be kinder to yourself in the face of challenges in motherhood. Sign up below:

    2. Not paying enough attention to sleep cues:

    The first few months with a newborn can be a blur of feedings, diaper changes, and sleepless nights.

    While adjusting to the new routine, I realized that I didn’t know when my baby was actually tired.

    When I would try to get him to sleep or when he would wake up every 10 minutes, I constantly questioned if he was overtired, under-tired, too hungry, or too full.

    News flash, there’s no way of knowing if any of these are the cause for your baby’s sleep troubles. You need to understand their cues.

    One of the biggest newborn mistakes I made was not paying close enough attention to these cues in the early stages.

    Understanding when my baby was tired or overstimulated could have played a pivotal role in establishing a more predictable sleep schedule.

    I could’ve created an environment where we both got more sleep when he was a newborn.

    I started paying closer attention to subtle signs like eye rubbing, ear rubbing, yawning, or decreased activity.

    When I started to respond to these cues right away, I was able to create an environment for my baby to sleep for longer periods.

    This adjustment not only improved my baby's sleep quality but also contributed to a more restful experience for me.

    Don’t get me wrong, we still have our challenges even now that he’s 8 months old. But, by observing him more closely, I’ve begun to understand my baby more.

    3. Unnecessarily worrying about my milk supply

    One of the most anxiety-inducing moments for me as a first-time mom was the fear that I’d have an insufficient milk supply. I think this is a common anxiety among many new moms.

    I found myself falling into the trap of thinking I needed to do everything imaginable to improve my milk production.

    I would drink special teas, research recipes with brewer’s yeast, and spend my time pumping after feeding my newborn.

    Part of the reason for this anxiety is because my newborn lost 10% of his birth weight.

    I talk more about my breastfeeding journey in this article, but the real reason this happened was that we weren’t getting his latch right.

    Plus, it’s normal for newborns to lose some weight.

    The reality was that once my baby was able to latch properly, he started to grow just fine. My milk supply was sufficient from the beginning and I didn’t need to continue to stress out.

    Remember to trust your bodies and recognize that variations in milk supply are natural.

    If you notice your baby isn’t gaining enough weight and if they seem to have trouble sleeping, seek guidance from a lactation consultant or healthcare provider before trying to do “all the things” to improve your milk supply. These concerns might not be a milk supply issue.

    Understanding the importance of responsive feeding, I learned to focus on my baby's cues rather than fixating on perceived inadequacies in my milk production.

    My body produced exactly what my baby needed.

    4. Not setting ground rules:

    The arrival of a new baby often brings an influx of people who mean well, eager to share in the joy of your growing family.

    While these interactions are heartwarming, I realized that I hadn't set clear boundaries from the beginning.

    From unsolicited photo-taking to premature social media announcements, I found myself navigating situations that could have been avoided with open communication.

    Establishing ground rules early on is essential for maintaining a positive and respectful environment for both you and your baby.

    I actually suggest making a list of ground rules during pregnancy and practicing what you will tell people if they’re about to overstep.

    I started communicating my expectations with family and friends regarding privacy, photo-sharing, and social media announcements.

    With better communication, I created an atmosphere that allowed my partner and I to enjoy our baby without stressing about what other people were doing to insert themselves into this special time for us.

    5. Not asking for enough help:

    The myth of the supermom can be a heavy burden for new moms.

    I really thought I could do everything on my own, from feeding my baby, putting him to sleep, cooking food, taking care of appointments, and doing house chores.

    Sometimes, you just feel like it’s easier to get things done yourself than to ask for help, y’know?

    I discovered that asking for help is not a sign of weakness but a necessary part of self-care.

    Balancing the demands of caring for a newborn, household responsibilities, and personal well-being requires support from loved ones.

    I started to delegate tasks more and easily accepted offers of help.

    Embracing the support around me allowed me to focus on bonding with my baby and navigating the challenges of being a first-time mom easier. If you only take one thing away from this article, avoid this newborn mistake.

    6. Not enough tummy time:

    I knew the importance of incorporating sufficient tummy time into my baby's daily routine from the start.

    What I didn’t realize was that I wasn’t doing it enough.

    Because my baby didn’t like tummy time, we only did it for a couple of minutes at a time. This meant he mostly was lying on his side and his back during playtime.

    Tummy time is crucial for a baby's motor skills development, helping strengthen neck, shoulder, and arm muscles.

    Realizing that he wasn’t getting enough, I began incorporating more tummy time into our daily schedule.

    I introduced fun activities and interactive play during these sessions to make tummy time a more enjoyable experience for my baby.

    Gradually increasing the duration of tummy time supported my baby's physical development and created moments of joy and connection.

    Luckily, he’s meeting all his milestones, but now the one side of his head is a bit flatter than the other. It’s getting better but could’ve been avoided with more tummy time.

    7. Taking the baby to crowded places:

    The excitement of introducing a new family member often results in showcasing your baby to friends and family.

    Not only that, but I was just excited to be out and about when I finally got the OK from my midwife.

    However, exposing a newborn to crowded places carries potential risks, especially in terms of increased exposure to germs and infections.

    Crowds are also a recipe for overstimulation. When I took my baby out for some quick shopping when he was 2 months old, he was screaming in the store and I was all by myself.

    I started to be more selective about outings. I chose to go on quiet walks and ensured that visitors were mindful of hygiene practices.

    Creating a balance between sharing the joy of my son and safeguarding his health became a priority during postpartum.

    Additional Don'ts:

    Though the above newborn mistakes were some that I made as a first-time mom, there are some others I didn’t make. I want to share them here in case you’ve been making them yourself or are expecting a baby:

    Trying to feed your baby on a strict schedule

    Though the eat-play-sleep schedule is super popular, it doesn't work for all moms, like me.

    Instead, I suggest simply engaging in responsive feeding and observing your baby’s cues.

    Feeding your baby on demand is crucial for your milk supply and ensures your baby is getting what they need to grow.

    This approach created a responsive and attuned feeding relationship between my baby and me.

    Avoid putting a blanket over your baby when they sleep:

    To reduce the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS), it's crucial not to cover your baby with a blanket while they sleep.

    Though it’s tempting to put a blanket on them, it’s better just to ensure your room is at a comfortable temperature so they don’t get cold.

    Opt for lightweight sleep clothing that will offer warmth without compromising safety.

    Don’t let your baby sleep on their side and tummy:

    Following the American Academy of Pediatrics guidelines, I prioritized placing my baby on his back to sleep.

    This simple practice significantly reduces the risk of SIDS and promotes safe sleep habits.

    By the time they know how to roll, it’s generally safe to let them sleep on their side. If they try to sleep on their tummy, they’ll probably just wake up if they don’t know how to roll onto their back yet.


    Reflecting on my experiences as a first-time mom has been humbling. I wish I had someone tell me what newborn mistakes to avoid. I imagine it would've saved me from some unnecessary frustrations.

    Still, I hope my insights are valuable to you.

    By embracing the imperfections of early motherhood, I hope to contribute to a culture that normalizes the struggles of parenting.

    The journey of motherhood is a unique and personal adventure for every woman.

    Learning from our missteps is an integral part of this beautiful and imperfect process.

    Let me know if there are other mistakes you’d add to this list! And if you feel guilty for a mistake grab my FREE journal today so you can ditch that mom guilt in less than 10 minutes. Sign up below:

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